Welcome to MartinGoodman.com

You have been brought to this page (most likely through the wondrous Google.com) through your interest in Carlos Castaneda, shamanism, the Amazon or ayahuasca. My book I Was Carlos Castaneda is the jump-off point for much of the content on this site. Please feel free to dance around the site, using the buttons to the left (the thumbnail picture of me is the homepage). An introductory essay is below - scroll down rather than click.

Such narrow, narrow confines we live in. Every so often, one of us primates escapes these dimensions, as Martin Goodman did. All we can do is rattle the bars and look after him as he runs into the hills. We wait for his letters home. ~ Susan Salter Reynolds, The Los Angeles Times

I Was Carlos Castaneda, an introduction - Martin Goodman, November 2002

In April 1998 the writer, sorcerer and anthropologist Carlos Castaneda lay dying in Los Angeles while I was with a shaman in the Andes. My experiences in Peru linked myself and Castaneda without my knowing.

Carlos Castaneda came north from South America to study at the University of Los Angeles. His thesis, published as The Teachings of Don Juan in 1968, kickstarted a series of best-selling books that found wisdom in an esoteric world at a tangent to our own. Castaneda became a star of the psychedelic era, but tended to vanish for long periods sooner than play the celebrity. Critics dismembered his works, seeking to separate the fact from the fiction, but the books contain a power that makes such analysis irrelevant.

My journey to Peru involved a retreat deep into the Amazon jungle. My guides were shamans, and my objective was to take part in ceremonies using the powerful hallucinogenic brew ayahuasca. The visionary teachings I received from ayahuasca were profound. When readers encounter a seven foot beetle and bee, I hope they pause to recognize the very real rewards of paying attention to the natural world.

Castaneda died and I almost followed. I was aware of the dark side of sorcery, the dangers of black magic, but even so was woefully naïve. I thought black magic only had power if one believed in it. That was as foolish as thinking a bullet can't harm you if you don't see it coming. In the middle of one ayahuasca ceremony the shaman got up and fled the circle. He was involved in a war with another shaman, who had let fly a poisoned dart. These darts are often carried from a shaman's mouth in the form of an insect, in this case mosquitoes. Once they are let loose they have to land. My shaman had deflected the dart away from himself and into me.

He confessed to this later, after I had been pulled back from the point of death with a condition previously unknown to doctors. I Was Carlos Castaneda might attract people to a shamanic path, for the wonders and teachings of such a journey are vivid in its pages. Start such a journey though and it's best to be aware of the perils involved. If you're interested in taking a shamanic journey, yet you want to come back safe, this book is a vital guide.

To turn my experiences into such a useful guide I needed perspective. I needed a teacher. When the pupil is ready, the master appears. I first encountered him on the edge of the mountain village in France where I have my home. He introduced himself. "Carlos Castaneda," he said. His handshake was a whiteout that left my mind blank.

"But you're dead," I said, and told him about the newspaper reports.

"Details … mere details," he replied, and engaged with my life for twenty-four hours. Dead or not, the man was ripe. His presence was physical and overwhelming. One expects a guest to show some decorum, but this was not Castaneda's way. What's mine was his. Stop objecting to this and I could come to see that the truth was reciprocal, that what's his was also mine.

Castaneda badgered and shaped my reluctant tales from Peru out of mere anecdote and into wisdom. Then he led me into the French Pyrenees. For all the wondrous lessons of the Amazon, extreme illness and my sense of betrayal had forced me back into a state of separation. A walk with Castaneda was a trip back into the elements. In simple terms one vast current of energy connects all of life, and he plugged me back in. The time with him was electric.

You want to know why to be cautious in front of mountains and how they shape our destiny? Come spend time with Castaneda. You're intrigued by the nature of resurrection and would like to reclaim lost youth? Castaneda has answers for you.

He allowed me ten questions at the end of his stay, and stopped me at nine. I took the tenth as a promise that he would return. I've glimpsed him twice since, once in France and once on the campus of UCLA, but that sheer physical gust of his presence has stayed elusive. The Castaneda of my book was magnificent company and I miss him. I am delighted to share him with readers, and hope it spins them back into the works of his lifetime.

For further reading on this site, try: I WAS CARLOS CASTANEDA: a survivor's guide.

Reviews

A marvelous book with rich teachings that particularly touch the heart of death -- and, thus, life itself. ~ Thom Hartmann, author, "The Last Hours of Ancient Sunlight"

From the Pyrenees to the Amazon rainforest, Martin Goodman vividly describes Castaneda's most powerful and important teachings-the nature of the journey beyond death. ~ Alberto Villoldo, Ph.D., author of "Shaman, Healer, Sage" and "Dance of the Four Winds"